It’s My Birthday: Here’s 43 Lessons from 43 Years of Life
Life gets better when you stop trying to become someone else and start becoming more honestly yourself.
Family is not perfect, and neither are you. Love grows when you stop needing everyone to be flawless before you let them matter.
Friends are medicine.
Let children be children, and stop expecting them to live up to the standards of adults. They only get one go at childhood.
Don’t take life too seriously. Nobody gets out of this without awkward photos, bad decisions, and at least one questionable haircut.
Santosa (a yoga term meaning contentment) is learning to want what you have while still being brave enough to grow.
Still no one has topped the Beatles, but, Manchester is the centre of the universe for music; Oasis, The Smiths, The Stone Roses, The Bee Gees, Happy Mondays, James, Courteeners and all the rave culture. I’m not patriotic in the least, but I am proud to be a Manc.
The body is not a trophy. It is the vehicle that carries you through love, grief, work, joy, dancing, training, and all the ordinary miracles.
Yoga has taught me that peace is not something you buy, achieve, or earn. It is something you remember, usually after you stop trying so hard.
You can be spiritual and still be funny, flawed, ambitious, tired, sarcastic, and occasionally tempted by chips and gravy on a tray with a can of dandelion and burdock.
Satya, (a yoga teaching meaning truthfulness), is not just about telling the truth. It is about living in a way that does not mean you abandon yourself.
Ahimsa, (a yoga teaching meaning kindness), starts with how you speak to yourself when nobody else is listening.
Tapas, (a yoga teaching meaning discipline), is not punishment. It is love and humility.
Svadhyaya, (a yoga teaching meaning self-study), is the brave work of asking, “Why do I keep doing that?” without turning it into self-attack.
Vairagya, (a yoga teaching meaning) letting go, sounds “spiritual” until you actually have to release the thing, the version of yourself, or the outcome you were gripping.
Purpose does not usually arrive like lightning. Sometimes it is built quietly, one honest choice at a time.
Doing what you love is not always easy. Sometimes it asks a lot from you.
Fitness is not just about looking strong. It is about feeling capable enough to live with more freedom.
Strength changes the way you meet the world.
Rest is not laziness.
Pray when you need guidance. Not because you have all the answers, but because you are finally humble enough to ask.
Love is risky, and that is exactly why it matters. You cannot keep your heart fully protected and fully alive at the same time.
Your children, your family, your friends, they will not remember how perfectly you managed life. They will remember how present you were.
Say sorry quicker.
You’re never too old to learn something new or start again.
Forgive yourself, and keep doing your best.
Laugh at yourself allot. If you can’t laugh at your own persona, life is going to be difficult and your ego will run the show.
Music can change the way you feel inside.
Stop waiting until you feel ready. Most of my life began before confidence arrived. I was a child preacher at 6, Dad at 19, business owner at 21. None of it planned and I wasn’t ready until it arrived.
You do not need everyone to understand your path.
Don’t believe everything yous see online.
Don’t compare your life to someone’s highlight reel.
Ageing is strange. Some things soften, allot of things ache, but the good news is that most things finally stop needing approval.
The easiest way to be valued is to be a good listener.
Be the one person in their life (your family, your friends, your students, the person who pack your shopping), who doesn’t judge them, and they don’t need to impress.
If you are lucky enough to find work that lights you up, protect it & feed it because you are winning the game of life.
The nervous system does not respond well to a life built entirely on pressure. Make space for beauty, slowness, silence, daft conversations and rude jokes.
The heart needs community. No amount of success replaces being known by people who can tell when your “I’m fine” is bs.
Namaste is not just a nice word at the start of class. It is a reminder that the light in me really can recognise the light in you.
Yoga doesn’t teach you to be calm all the time - that would be hell. It shows you how to return when life pulls you off centre.
Jesus said some pretty profound words and you don’t have to be religious or believe in a God to let them into your heart; what I get from them are love is the most important quality, don’t be afraid to ask, look for compassion before judgement, we all fall short sometimes so help people rise, if you believe in yourself you can achieve anything, “God” isn’t a man with a beard threatening you to obey his every command because God is the quite voice of love inside your heart, forgiveness is a power not because hurt does not matter, but because bitterness can become a deep wound, don’t do a good thing for the applause of others, do them because your heart moved you to and remember words are no match for actions.
The older I get, the more I believe this, love is the practice. Not the soft, fluffy version. Love is the one that keeps choosing connection.
At 43, I do not think I have life figured out. But I know this much, move your body, tell the truth, love your people, pray when you are lost, laugh when you can, rest when you need to, and don’t wait too long to live fully.